i'm surviving. when people use the term heart broken, i know exactly what i means. my heart hurts so much it feels like it might burst. so i do... i cry and after a second my heart releases and i'm ok again. i guess i'm dealing with it. today jessica, keely, kei and lynn came and hung out with me. i made fajitas and lynn made salsa. kei helped me clean the table. too bad mai couldn't come.

its been a good day which started bad. first i slammed my finger in the door on my way out of the complex. i forgot my wallet on the bus, which nixed my plan of getting a coffee drink since i couldn't sleep too much last night. so i was groggy in the morning which i had to sit and wait for the MTA to locate the driver of the bus i was on. and it seems that this PARTICULAR bus changed route 3 times that day making it hard to track. goodness, of all the buses i could be on. they couldn't get a hold of the driver so they advise me to cancel all my cards. so i do. luckily, i have the best supervisor ever. she helped me deal with it at work. she LET me deal with it at work. that made it so much easier.

good news: paul says he might be able to keep his cell at boot camp. he leaves tommorow for oklahoma.