its been such a emtional roller coaster week... i haven't had time to blog. tomorrow paul leaves. i guess after that i'd have all the time in the world to blog for 9 weeks. i'm such a whrilwind of emotion i can't believe. first i'm happy that this will be one of the first steps towards the rest of our lives. second, i'm so sad and so insecure that i've been finding comfort in food. third, i'm angry at myself for being so sad and insecure. i don't want to cry.... but the tears start welling up everytime think about how i will be waking up alone in the morning, or how i won't have anyone to talk to while i'm kicking butt in a hero wars game (or when i'm losing badly), or i won't have someone to ask what we should have for dinner cause i can't decide. i know the first week will be toruture, and i will probably blogging often, or vegging out in front of the computer... no i might not even do that because it would remind me of paul too much. or i might just be fine and dandy.... doing whatever i please. who knows...