i'm at work right now. today is thursday... my long shift again. i had roscoe's for dinner last night. i brought the left overs for lunch today. i love roscoe's. i think i like the chicken the most. i ordered the country boy, which is three wings and a waffle. i ordered smothered potatoes and macaroni and cheese too... which was definately TOO much food... thats why i have leftovers for lunch. not that i am complaining or anything.

it seems like this time of our life is the make it or break it time for relationships. i guess its because at this time of your life you are deciding if you really do want to stay with this person for the rest of your life or not... and reality sets in... this is not high school anymore, this is adulthood. i am glad that paul has decided that he could spend his life with me... and i feel bad for people who are not lucky as i am. a lot of people have had thier relationship broken in last couple months... i would feel devistated if paul told me this wouldn't work out at this point in my life... i can only imagine. paul says i shouldn't be guilty of what i have... be happy. i am happy. i just want everyone to be happy too.

paul told me that i have "for the good of humanity" complex. i think its more like "for the sake of our children" complex. i'm always crying at the sight of children in need or in situations that they shouldn't be in. i hope that in the next 9~18 weeks that paul is gone i can be independent and act more instead of cry at articles in magazines or spend money at the UNICEF store. anyone interested in joining me?