i'm at work now.... the room is quiet and seems a bit eerie. paul is on a plane to oklahoma as we speak with a layover in texas. i'm doing much better. work has been keeping me busy. this morning i looked at the clock at 7:50 and before i knew it it was 8:30. paul sent me a pic of his buddies via txt. i think a bit that the phone had spolied me. when i said good bye that should've been it or i think i wouldn't have been so sad. but also the phone has brought me comfort, especially at night when its hard for me to sleep by myself. poor guy probably hasn't had good sleep while at MEPS because i keep calling him. i feel like a little child. its time for me to grow up.

jill has sent me lots of links of stuff i can keep myself busy with (thanks!). i think the point here is to pass the driving test on monday! i failed it on tuesday because i think i was too comfortable with the road, driving like i should AFTER i get my license (you know what i mean). i rolled stops, i didn't look behind in the blind spots sometimes... i was soooo angry at myself for driving like i did! (of course unlike last time the tester didn't say i need more confidence, so i was happy about that). this is kinda funny coming from a girl just two weeks ago was afraid of driving anywhere. i even drove on the freeway already but it was at 5 o'clock on a saturday and not really crowded... it wasn't so bad (haha). i feel dumb and slightly grown up. i wish i took this step sooner and i still have much growing up to do.

my mom got a job yesterday. i really don't know what she is doing but i'm glad she has found her way back from where ever she was (as in the depression after my stepfather's death). i'm excited for her and i told her when i get my license that i will take her out to drink somewhere. she just laughed. she has been supportive in everyway which slightly surprises me... but she always had to a degree (you just can't catch her on a bad day).

things are definately looking up for me. now for paul i don't know... something about a racist commander and cramps when he runs the mile... but i'm sure he will pull through. he says he doesn't know where i can send him mail to yet, but when i find out i'll post the address here and you guys can send him mail too.