its kinda funny. it just hit me that we are going to be parents, and i felt a little panicky inside. maybe its because paul is not here but i wondered how i would be as a single parent. *most* people who know *us* would agree *we* would be at least a 7 on a 1-10 scale (hopefully? haha), but what about me... just myself? i often look to paul for reassurance about EVERYTHING. things from what i should eat for lunch (he usually says, whatever you want when i want to know what he wants lol), i reach for his arm when i am hiking down a slippery slope, and i ask his opinion on if i look 'fat' or 'pregnant' (hehe). then i got really sad and stopped thinking about it. its already been 2 weeks since he left. i missed his text at 5am this morning. i wish he would log on to tell me everything will be alright and that he knows that i would be a wonderful mom while he is gone.